“Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.” ~Jean Paul Sartre
Working on myself, is, by far, my most difficult challenge. However, I work at it everyday, to heal myself and become as conscious and serene as I possibly can be, while present on this earth. Each day is a new day and this journey is part of the reason for this blog I started only 4 months ago… a process of healing. I guess I feel if I write it out and actually share it with others, without having to speak the words I am fearful to speak, this will work for me…. mainly because I have been silent for so long (the majority of my life). I guess I could “just” write it down, privately… however, to me, that is still just hiding the pain, keeping it to myself. Some, that may be in my same situation, may go as far as seeking professional help, you know, speaking to someone, someone that is neutral…. but I don’t really believe in all that too much, talking to a complete stranger. However, that’s my opinion.
Although I am not completely ready to share with you everything, I am absolutely grateful that I can use this platform to share with you a little piece of me, in each blog I write, while taking this journey…. so thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts and comments. Every blog, up to this point, has been inspired by a conversation or another’s experience. Each time I listen to my friends, I am able to relate in some way, because of my past. So, I write about it and place my perspective on their life’s situation, by adding what I have learned because of experiencing a similar situation in my life. This, in its entirety, is my healing and part of gaining control of my life, that was once out of control. Yet, I have a lot of work to do. I have come so far and I am so grateful for the journey I have taken thus far. Remember that everyone’s struggle is unique to them and them alone. In no way am I ever “promoting” or “telling” people how they should handle whatever it is they need to handle in their own personal lives. However, I will say this…. love yourself enough to want to heal. Love yourself enough to want to “know” what is causing the pain… because some of us know that we, as human beings, can do a great job with suppressing, ignoring or thinking we are “just OK.” My goal is to inspire and plant the seed of the ability to take control of your life and live your life, and not let life live you. To come to terms with mistakes, unfortunate events, sad moments, hurtful moments… and to acknowledge it, embrace it and heal from it… to become genuinely and 100% YOU.
Yes, life sucks! But it is through life that we learn who we really are and really know our purpose for being here. My journey, as well as your journey, is what and who we are… through all the bad and all the good… to be FREE. Sometimes events from the past have a mind of their own. Memories keep recirculating, when all you want is for them to disappear. We cannot control the actions of others, or even how life treats us, in general. However, we can control how we respond (not react) to it… learn from it, use it and gain power from it.
Again, I have a long way to go, but I am so grateful how far I have come. My happy days are absolutely happy days, and my not so happy days are the days you may not hear from me too much. However, never get it “twisted,” I am not an unhappy person, and I’m not crazy. I love my life, the people that are in it, immensely, and love who I have become. People can be “not so happy,” and still function everyday… it’s not being “fake,” it’s being true to yourself that you must truck on… because at the end of the day I am alive and have so much to be grateful for… loving me for me… my perfections, my imperfections, my mistakes and my successes, my sadness and my happiness, my pain and my serenity. Someday, I will share with you the core of my pain… but until then, I will give you a piece of me with each blog I write.
“Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.” Love and take care of you…
Love always, @thedesiredgurl
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